Hello! it's been 20 months since my last Blog on this E-blog site... I have other blogs too that I use more often and this one was just a fluke that my daughter said I should start ... I'm not very good at 'blogging' every week, or every month or apparently not even every year (LOL). I had decided to turn this blog into one about Cancer and my true love for 1/2 century but I guess it was way too heartbreaking or I got distracted with other activities and then forgot all about this one not wanting to face the true hurt and hopelessness of this terrible disease.
We've been fighting this beast since April of 2018 now... and the pain has increased, his body weight decreased (down to about 140 pounds now) and we are both getting worn down. Then Covid came along and it made it all the more difficult, not having friends and family around to help ease us down this path. I for one felt like the hermit out in the woods afraid of people.
The pain now requires 75 mg of Morphine three times a day. This medication scrambles the brain and makes it most difficult to even understand Jim's requests. A few times he thought he could fly or fix things but instead ended up in the Emergency room where they patched him up from his falls or cuts or broken bones; just to feel the pain of Cancer once again daily, never ending.
I talked to a friend the other day whose sister had Cancer, and the Doctors kept her breathing and "alive" for seventeen years ... but at what expense, what quality of life, what reasoning? I don't know what will happen to my precious 'Dude', but I will be by his side no matter what and do my best to comfort and love him no matter what!
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