Starting over! That is what life feels like to me now. I'm entering a new dimension of my life. One I dreamed of, wished for. But... as Grandma always said "When all of your wishes come true, little one, your dreams may be destroyed". This is so true. Often I dreamed of being on my own, alone, my own boss, slave, living life my way. When I was young, I dreamed of being an Actress, Famous one day. Then I began wishing for love, and my dream disappeared.
Now, I find myself alone, my own boss, slave, living life my way, and I choose what I want to do, have no one to tell me "that's silly to do that", or "have you considered all the consequences". I have no one to take care of but myself. Seems I have been a caretaker since I was fifteen years old... there have always been others around I always put first and cared for before my own needs or wants. Now, after a few weeks of this new chapter in my life, I find myself wishing I still had my true love by my side.
I must learn how to be me again. Not 'Jim and Kathie' . Although we were two individuals, very different in personalities, upbringing, outlooks on life, we merged our hearts, soul and minds together for over fifty years becoming truly one person. Now I am half a person and must find a way to become one, a whole person, alone. A widow in the 21st Century.
My solution. Kathie's K.I.S.S. Keep it Sweet and Simple. Starting over this blog, changing name from Living with Dude n' Cancer to Kathie's K.I.S.S. Taking it slow and easy while staying busy! Inventing new ways to pass the time while encouraging myself to blossom and grow and help others (and be a happy me). Take care of myself, so that I may help others by good nourishment, exercise, connections... make them FUN!
Kiss, kiss ♥
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